WHOLE

Definition:  a thing that is complete in itself.

The concept of being whole has absolutely nothing to do with acquired possessions or with being in an intimate relationship with someone. Being whole means being complete in yourself. YOUR SELF, meaning not your car, your house, your devices, your jewelry, just plain ol' you. It comes from all the qualities and characteristics that you embody. Its what makes you, you. Yes, physical attributes make up a part of your being but, let's dig deeper. It is your personality type, quiet or exuberant nature, your faith/spirituality, how you think, speak, process things, what you like to do, etc. I believe that wholeness also encompasses self-love and confidence. It's such an important aspect of an individual's life, and I don't think that it's emphasized enough at least not when I was growing up. This notion of self-love and being whole is fairly new if you ask me. Us millennials are much more aware and in tune with ourselves and our mental, spiritual and emotional health, than the generations prior. They were built on survival as opposed to nurture. Think about it, if you're in your twenties or older, chances are your parents never sat you down and spoke to you about confidence, self-love, or being whole. They'd probably laugh at you and ask what you're talking about or shrug you off. Nowadays, that reassurance is needed, especially in a social media-driven world.

I was having a conversation with my parents the other day about 'social' media and my dad was adamant that there are no leaders anymore. That everybody is just a follower of someone else. I told him this is a new age and that technology is advancing; all these platforms are used to connect us regular folk to what/who we never had connections with. Giving regular folk the opportunities we never had. Ryan basically broke the internet with his toy review. My point is, in order for our younger generations to defeat the feelings of inadequacy, they need to be aware of themselves so they don't get lost in the hype.

Becoming whole is a part of my self-discovery journey. Most of my early twenties I felt like I needed someone by my side to complete me. Will said it best, pre-entanglement. You have to be happy on your own before getting into the relationship because it isn't anyone else's responsibility to grant you happiness. Once I understood that concept, I chose to focus on me. I still had some things twisted though ie. wanting to go on a date, not because of any particular interest in the person but solely because I wanted to go out. Do you see a ring on this finger? No. That's gotten me nowhere. Moving on.

Wholeness means completion. God made the world in seven days. He completed it. Like he knew when he woke up on that seventh day that he was done, he was ti'ed, he ain't wanna do no mo'. That's what being whole means. You've maxed out. When he made Adam he was pleased. The Bible never said he thought he needed some extra juice so he went back, nope HE WAS DONE! The only thing he ADDED was a mate for Adam (Genesis 2: 21-25). Dassit! 🙅🏾‍♀️ Some of us mess up on our journey of becoming whole by adding some miscellaneous things/people that didn't belong in the first place. Imagine, God said do not eat of the tree of good and evil or you will die. What did my darling Eve do? Convinced Adam to pick up what he didn't put down. Now my uterus is paying for it 🙄 (Genesis 3:16). What I'm trying to say is, do yourself some justice. Before you seek things to add to yourself/lifestyle, discover who you are. Read books, listen to podcasts, take yourself on a date, go for a drive out every now and again. I knew I was a true introvert when after the event, on my way home I was on the highway jammin' to music as though there was a party in my car. I thrive in those moments. If I didn't take time to really deal with me, flaws and all, I wouldn't know the woman I am today. My folks will tell you, I'll say 'hey', pop in, sit for a couple of minutes, and then bounce. I like my space. It gives me a chance to recharge. I know my triggers and my limits too. I enjoy a good outing but the wind-down is so much sweeter for me.

Have you ever seen someone pick up something that does not suit them at all? And you wonder what in God's great green earth were they thinking? Yea, they're searching for fulfillment. We all do it at some point or another. I spent a great deal of time searching for what I thought would fulfill me when all I needed to do was quiet the noise of everyday life around me so that I could truly discover my life's purpose. If you're feeling lost and confused, maybe you should do the same. I am much more grounded in knowing that I am on a journey to becoming my greatest self, rather than wondering if God forgot about me.

To think that I feared this, meaning stepping out on faith and starting my blog and writing for the world to see. Now I'm in bed writing to you, in hopes that my experience and analogies will bless you all the ways in which the lessons I've learned, did me. It is the most freeing experience in all my 27 years of living aside from jet-skiing in Aruba with no glasses on thinking that life was made. Allow yourself to get to that level of freedom. The journey to becoming whole is probably the greatest gift that you can grant yourself. Break free from the noise around you and focus on you I understand that responsibilities are a thing but I know you get at least ten minutes to yourself everyday, use it wisely. everybody has responsibilities but you have a bathroom and I know you get at least 10 minutes to yourself every day.

DO WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL COMPLETE.