Insecure like Issa

Do you find yourself operating out of fear? The older we get, the more our insecurities become evident if we don’t nip that sucker in the bud. This is why introspection is so important. Sometimes you have to go back to the little girl inside of you and repel all the lies she’d been told. Don’t allow the stronghold of someone else’s tongue to limit you from doing what’s on your heart or being the person you’ve been called to be. Also! This is a big one: STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS! It took me years (you read right) YEARS, for me to fully understand that ‘comparison is the thief of joy’.

In this world of social media, people post the picture perfect version of themselves. It’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind if you don’t have a firm ground to stand on. I would get so caught up in being single, that I would compare my life to someone else’s, my looks, my academic accolades, my personality etc, to see what I lacked and what I needed, to be in a relationship. When some things didn’t add up, I’d be even more frustrated. That my friend, is unhealthy. I found myself journaling. I got so sick and tired of these unhealthy habits, that I had to dig deeper into my past. What was I really yearning for? Understand that your insecurities may stem from the guards you’ve put up during childhood. You have to break those walls down. Understand yourself.

If you’re like me, you may have taken a little longer to figure out where your life was headed while all your friends were moving forward. Post-undergrad, I took a gap year. I needed time to figure out my ‘what next‘. My biology degree was closing more doors than it had opened. During this time I decided that nursing school was the best route. I spent time working odd jobs at New York & Company (making minimum wage), a dental office (making minimum minimum wage), Target (where I was terminated), just to make enough money to pay for my prerequisites. There were times I felt like I was ‘behind’, because my friends were starting their careers, buying cars, getting into relationships, living their best lives, and here I was going back to school for a SECOND bachelor’s degree. If I wanted to prevail, I understood that I had to focus on my journey and not on everyone else's.

Now, five years later, I’m respected in my career, giving my best self to my patients, a co-facilitator of the mentorship program on my unit AND being my truest self with YOU. If I had allowed myself to care what others may have said or thought, I would’ve missed out on this blessing. I’m a firm believer that God will teach you a lesson with what he’s brought you through.

My sistren, I want you to be real with yourself. I urge you to write down your limiting beliefs - what do you tell yourself that maybe holding you back from better? Why do you compare yourself to others? Why are you jealous of your friend, when you should be happy for her? Write this down. Inspect the list. Revisit the place which this originated. Allow yourself to work through it. Pray over the list and release it to God. He wants only the best for you and He cannot deliver, to this insecure you.

Also, go watch Dr. Dharius Daniels' (Lead Pastor at Change Church) YouTube series - Insecure.