Chapters

I was writing in my journal one night yes, I still write in my journal, shoot you better be happy because that’s where half of these ideas are birthed. Anyway, and as I was writing with this pretty felt tip aquamarine blue colored ink pen, it ran out. Sis, I was distraught! I was looking like 😳 “naa”; and the typical Caribbean queen I am, I started flashing the pen 🤦🏾‍♀️. I knew the pen was done but I didn’t want to let it go. That’s that toxic 'ish; not wanting to let go of something that been dead and gone because you’re waiting for that spark to come back, knowing damn well that it won’t … but that’s another story for another day. The pen runs out of ink, and I draw for another pen and the color clearly doesn’t match, but whatever, right? As I finish spilling out my heart in my trusted journal, I look back at the words that are clearly missing half of its letters and write “blog post” next to it. Days later, I pull up my Notes, and write “Chapters”.

It is so very significant to me, especially at this age. The older I get, the more I realize that life really has chapters. Some of the people I associated with ten to fifteen years ago, I do not associate with now. For a variety of reasons. Sometimes you drift away from people because their main purpose was to be a lesson in a season. Not everyone was supposed to ride with you to your final destination. Not everyone teaches you a bad lesson either. Understand that sometimes people go their separate ways because of life events; maybe they had kids, got married, had to pick up extra responsibilities, and the list goes on.

Have you ever read a fictional novel, and wondered why the author didn’t end a character in the previous chapter? It’s like well damn, Derwin was no good for her anyway, why is he still lurking across the street when Melanie done moved on clearly I’ve been watching reruns of The Game. I’m just saying. Chapters are crucial to one’s growth. You can’t hang with everyone and do everything and expect to move forward. I keep saying this, but NOT everyone is for you. Some people are content in being stagnant. This is why when you mention an idea, a topic, something bigger than where their mindset allows them to travel, they shut it down or get offended. I believe that we have to be overprotective of our future chapters because not everyone can appreciate the novel we choose to write.

I don’t want to sound like a negative Nancy. As I’ve stated previously, not every breakup, is a bad one. It is perfectly fine to genuinely congratulate another from the sidelines. I’ve learned that the hard way. I had to realize that my book and someone else’s was meant to be different. I have friends from all different walks of life and I am able to appreciate each of them for what they’ve taught me. Once I owned my confidence and embarked on a journey through self-love, I was able to lay down my insecurities, and stop projecting them on others. I have friends who are married and have babies, but I understand that my chapter may be Pursuing Purpose. And that’s okay. Stop messing with the flow of your life, and your circles; the more you force it, the more the story stops making sense.

God sacrificed His only begotten son, for our sins. I know God would’ve been pissed if Jesus came through and said he wanted to pursue carpentry when people’s lives were in need of saving. Imagine how He feels about you. Jesus knew that at a certain point, He would be betrayed, He would have been posted up on the cross, and He wasn’t worried, no cap, you not about to pierce my hands and feet and I’m not worried, BUT I’m working on my faith. He rose up out of the tomb like nothing happened. He understood that there was a time to be a carpenter, there was a time to fellowship with His disciples, and there would be a time where He would have to sacrifice. The same goes for you love. Go read my post Sacrifice; lay down whatever is holding you back from writing that next chapter. Sometimes it’s waiting to burst out from the seams, but we’re too stubborn to let go of what was and afraid to pursue what is.

If the pen is running out love, let it be. It’s time to uncap a new pen. Start anew. Start fresh. Embark on a new journey.

Go ‘head, write a new chapter.